Fleur De Lys Publishing

MONDAY 29th September 2008

Newsletter Issue 1 - October 2008

Fleur De Lys Publishing is a brand spanking new company formed by author Jude Calvert-Toulmin in order to get her books on shelves as soon as possible rather than waiting a million years for a large busy publishing company to do it for her.

The first novel to be released is by the enigmatic and mysterious Julia (Jude in disguise) and will be available on Amazon within a few weeks. Keep subscribed to this newsletter to be informed when you can buy the book. We will not spam you, all you'll get is a monthly newsletter and an announcement when a new book is released.

We'll tell you if Jude gets on Richard and Judy of course, or invited to Buckingham Palace. Oh yeah, if she wins the Man Booker prize for her 'compendium of filth', as it's already being described, you'll get told about that too. We suggest you tell your mates about this newsletter so they can hear about it from you before anyone else!

The new Fleur De Lys website.

Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law

Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law is the sexually explicit tale of lonely people trying to find happiness by daring to follow their hearts. Some people shout about finding the wild place, whilst others are quietly swimming in it...

Kate married far too young. Now husband Alex, once the love her life, bores her to tears. He's so busy gardening and watching repeats of Top Gear on the tele, he would never guess about Kate's secret life with her lover Colin.

But gardening and Top Gear can keep a man happy for only so long. Especially with a Mother-in-Law as voluptuous and gorgeous as Julia, a lonely widow who hasn't had sex for five years.

Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law, by Julia, is due for publication Autumn 2008.

A word from the Fleur De Lys PA, Honey Higginbotham

Hi, I'm Honey Higginbotham.

My duties include book-keeping (making sure all my copies of Vogue are in order) attending breakfast networking meetings (flirting with investors) and writing this bloody boring newsletter.

When I asked JCT what I should include, she just barked "Let's give 'em a blast of Reveille from the thought trumpet and see who makes it in time for breakfast".

Okaaaaay.

I've also been told this section is "key" and it's where I present the "face of the company" to the world.

Hold on there's a list of "keys" here I'm meant to include, yawn.

"Standards of excellence" yeah whatever, my nails are a standard of excellence and they bloody well should be, they cost me 25k per annum.

What else, er yeah "Reviewing our deliverables". Booorrrring. The only deliverable I'm interested in is my monthly delivery of Jimmy Choos. Next! Er...

"Our achievement focus over the next few months will be on rolling out our programme of widening participation to our client base."

When I asked her what the bloody hell that meant she just said "Let's go for a little paddle in the concept canoe, shall we, Honey?"

Jesus. I am wasted in this job. Next month I'll fill you in on some hot gossip from the office...